I’m being a little brave as writing is something I have a difficult time with. I’m really not sure why. It has always been difficult for me to express my thoughts and feelings into the right words. I’ve been tip toeing out of my comfort zone for a little while now. Why the sudden act of courage? I recently gave birth to a beautiful little girl named Aria. I believe becoming a mom has pushed me to do and experience things I never would have before. I’m not talking about finding the courage to swim with sharks (which I've done) or go sky diving. I’m talking about pushing myself to be the best person and mother I can be. To me, that is scarier than H-E double hockey sticks! I have such a hard time showing my vulnerable side and asking for help as I always want people to believe that I have it together. I’m far from that but I try to make it work. I feel like most of the moms reading this can relate to that.
I remember how I felt when my husband and I found out we were expecting. We were so ecstatic and I wanted to tell the world about our newest addition to our small family. Throughout my pregnancy I believed that I had it together. I would ask myself questions like, “why do I need to take a breastfeeding class?” or why do I need to read books like “What to Expect When You're Expecting?” I feel like my over confidence was just masking my fears and insecurities. As time went on and I entered the third trimester of my pregnancy fear and anxiety started to set in. Thoughts like “what if I'm a terrible mother?”, “What if I can’t handle running a business full-time while raising a baby?”
Fast forward to the day I went to the hospital after my water broke. My mind was racing during our drive down to Daytona. “This is it. I will become a mom today!” I was overwhelmed with excitement, fear, anxiety, and love. It is so hard to describe what I was feeling at that moment but as I think back now, it was literally the BEST feeling. I just wanted to meet Aria so badly. After pushing for over two hours Aria finally came into the world at 4:15 p.m. on May 15th, 2019. The nurses placed her in my arms and the only thing I felt at that moment was an overwhelming amount of love. I will never forget the moment she looked at me for the first time. All of my fears and worries just disappeared and I was just in the moment with my new little person. Gahhh, she is literally the cutest baby on the planet (now I know how all of my newborn photo mommies feel).
Aria has brought me the greatest joy and motivates me so much. She has helped me in every way possible and I cannot be more thankful for being her mom. I am so excited for all the experiences and adventures we will have as a family. I cannot wait to teach her how to use her first camera and to be there for her when she needs guidance. I can seriously go on and on!
Aria is almost two months old now and wow being a parent is literally the most rewarding! It is also the hardest thing I've ever done. I was so wrong about all the things I thought I knew about raising a baby. I have a new found respect for all of the mother’s I've photographed since I started my photography journey. I am so lucky to be able to capture these priceless memories for my clients and watch their children grow up.
I would love to get to know you & your story. Feel free to leave a comment below!
(One more thing! Any tips all you moms have for me would be appreciated)
Thank you to my husband for capturing these beautiful photos <3 Photographer in the making!